- Information for...
The schemeCSA's plain English law & policy guide
Access 2,300 support services for separated families
Personal wellbeing
Separation can affect our emotional wellbeing. It is a major life crisis that affects the way we feel, think and act.
Getting organised
Recording all your important family information in one place can provide you with a sense of structure and control at a time of upheaval and uncertainty.
Building confidence
Developing self-confidence is something only you can do. Relying on other people's praise can mean that you never learn to praise yourself. To hear and receive compliments is good, but in the end, it is you who determines how you think and feel about yourself.
Self-talk
Separate 'what I am'; from 'what I do'.
Examples:'I am a failure' to 'I failed at this'
'I am tactless' to 'what I said was tactless'.
Self-praise
Praise yourself when you do something, even if you didn't do it well.
Examples:'I did the best I could'
'I did that well'
'I'm pleased with the way I did that'.
Self-encouragement
It's okay to brag about yourself every now and then. Change negatives into positives.
Examples:'I'll give it a go and see what happens'.
Getting into action
- Develop goals that are reasonable and achievable. Don't set yourself up for failure.
- Have goals and interests for yourself apart from the children and work.
- Listen when people compliment you and thank them.
- Make time for yourself to relax.
- If you really like doing something, then do it—don't put it off.
- Try new things.
- Make time to talk to someone about your thoughts and feelings.
- Enjoy your achievements.
Communicating clearly
Effective communication does not just happen. It is a skill you learn. It enables people to:
- state clearly what they mean
- ensure the other person understands what is being said
- ensure the other person understands why the issue is important to you.
Communication tips for dealing with your ex
Financial pressures
Money issues and changes to financial arrangements often become the trigger for emotional outbursts during the separation process. The anger and hurt of the relationship break-up are often carried into fights about new financial arrangements.
See Me and my Money (PDF 691k) for some practical advice on how to manage your finances effectively post separation.
The Community Services Directory
There is help out there! The Community Services Directory provides information on community organisations nationwide that can provide you with assistance with many different issues.
Other resources
Me and My Kids- Parenting from a distance (PDF 485k)
What about Me - Taking care of yourself (PDF 2.9M)
Me and My Money - Practical money ideas (PDF 691k)
Me, My Kids and My Ex - Building a workable relationship with the other parent (PDF 836k)
